Honest dating

“I’m not interested in a serious relationship,” he’d say.

“I’m just looking for something casual.”I know I’m saying I just want to hook up at the moment, but if you stick around long enough, I’ll realize that you’re perfect for me — and we’ll live happily ever after, just like in all those romantic comedies your mother loves. I’d repeat the same pattern, hear some form of the same line, over and over again. They, too, had been dealing with paramours on the prowl for no-strings sex. But, ever the optimist, I continued to date, wary of guys who would tell me they just wanted casual sex right off the bat.

There will absolutely be people in the game who won’t tell you that’s what they’re looking for, mislead and disappoint you, or who will say they want one thing when they actually want something else.

But, like Maya Angelou said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” If someone you're interested in says they just want casual sex, believe them.

We got on each other’s nerves a lot; he drank all of my expensive scotch, and I hated the fact that he was a smoker. We had one more night together and then we parted ways.

My date turned out to be a total dud, but writer guy and I kept making eyes.

He didn’t tell me I was a bad person or that I was selfish.

He knew casual sex was all that I could give at the moment, and when he started wanting something more, he walked away.

By projecting my own desires onto our situation rather than hearing and respecting what they had told me at the start, I was setting myself up for heartbreak. The problem wasn’t casual sex, or the fact that it’s what they wanted.

The problem was me, and denial (and maybe rom-coms).

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